Christmas Crack

Last night Sarah was over for our weekly Top Chef date. While she was reading books to Noah at bedtime, I used the easiest recipe ever to create caramel corn. It took less than 5 minutes and the results are amazingly addictive. Sarah congratulated me on making crack, yummy, delicious crack.

I got the recipe from Angry Chicken and was, at first, doubtful it would turn out as well as she claimed it did. Using a brown paper grocery bag in the microwave just didn't sound like it would make something appealing. I should have realized that I would be eating it, not only that night, but for breakfast as well. I was warned, I should have known better.

Here is the easy peasy recipe for caramel crack corn:

1 stick butter
1 c. light brown sugar
1/4 c. white corn syrup
1/2 tsp. fancy salt if you have it

add later:
1/2 tsp baking soda
slivered almonds or nuts of your choice (optional)

Put about 3 quarts of popped corn in a brown paper (grocery) bag and set aside.
Mix first 4 ingredients and put in microwave. Boil on high for 2 minutes.
Stir in 1/2 teaspoon baking soda and nuts.
Pour caramel over popcorn and shake.
Put paper bag in microwave, cook on high, 1 minute.
Shake, cook on high for 1 minute again.
Shake, spread out on wax paper/non-stick foil to cool.
You can store this in jars or some other airtight container.
This makes a whole lot, like 2 cookie sheets full.

IF YOU MAKE IT PLEASE BE VERY, VERY HUNGRY AS YOU WILL NOT BE ABLE TO STOP EATING IT.

Tummy, so full, so very full!

American Mentality

Emily Strange was plagiarized

Wow. I love Emily. So sad that she is a rip off.

Glad someone noticed that this:

was stolen from this:

Nate the Great and the Lost List by Marjorie Weinman Sharmat is now on my request list at the library. It was published in 1978. From the research presented in the article I read, it seems that no one knows Emily was not an original creation. Sad. If this is true, I hope it is cleared up and the original author gets her dues. Just think of the thousands of girls who bought Emily paraphenilia at Hot Topic. Marjorie deserves a huge cut.

Thankful

We are supposedly in a recession. I can see the results in my bookings at work. This is a slow holiday season, but I am still getting paid commission versus $8 an hour, and for that I am thankful. My co-workers rock and I actually like going to work, for the most part.

I come home to a nice house, Stan and Noah happy to see me, and my little dog too. Having a loving, kind husband and amazing kid are the best parts of my life.

Sarah and Lori hang out with me every week, my sisters and Jesse are always on the phone or e-mail. I have Reade, John and so many other lovely people as my friends. I am grateful and humbled that such amazing people choose to spend their time with me. Thank you.

I have so many blessings that even the rough patches seem navigable. I'm not starry eyed, I'm just thankful.

For those of you who are retching at the sweetness of this post, thanks for making it to the end. This thanksgiving picture is for you. I titled it "Self-Brining."

Downy fabric softener uses animal fat. Ick.

For those of you who do not use organic (Method or 7th Generation for example) laundry products, now I think you will.

Mmm. . . cheeseburger fresh. The thought of my clothes covered in animal fat is not tasty. Not tasty at all.

Bedtime conversations with Noah

NOAH: . . . and then she said the A-word, B-word and F-word.
"Umm, what?" I think to myself.
ME: What is the A-word?
NOAH: Ass
Okay, it's what I expected.

ME: What is the B-word?
NOAH: Butt.
Whew. Not bitch, good. Now on to the final one. . .

ME: What is the F-word?
NOAH: Frow up.
ME: Frow up?
NOAH: Yeah.
ME: I think you mean "throw up."
NOAH: Oh, I guess it's the T-word then.

Gee, if only there was a website to give me ideas of what to do with tampons. . .

Oh, wait! There is!

I think my favorite (and by favorite, I mean most disturbing) is the bloody heart ear rings.


The description says: "These tampon heart earrings display both your romantic sentiments and your menstrual pride."

That's right: menstrual pride. I guess I'm supposed to be proud of my ability to bleed without wounding myself first. Go, uterus, go!

Oh, well, I'm off to make tampon ornaments. Now you know what you're getting for Christmas!

Mama's got two of em

Noah loves to read. He tries to read everything. Tonight I was checking up on my favorite blogs and from behind me a little voice started sounding out the title. "Bobs?" he said.

"Yes, Noah, it's Bobs" I said with a giggle, then a laugh.

He walked away, proud of himself. I know he can spell butt and a handful of it's synonyms, but thankfully, boobs is not yet on his radar. At least not this week. . .

Halloween, continued.

I know, I know, I am behind in blogging. What with still being on Halloween and all. Don't worry, I will get to the election (woo-hoo!) and Stan's birthday by Xmas, at the very latest.

On Halloween, the kids were asked to dress as a favorite storybook character. Skulls and vampires were not allowed, so Noah got costume #2: The Cat In The Hat.

Cutest Cat in the Hat EVER!

His best friend Alan was Batman.

His other best friend Emily was a snow princess. Her twin sister wore the same costume.

When we got home, Noah wanted a picture with our neighbor Bersi in his lion outfit.

Noah decided he didn't want to be a vampire for trick or treating. So here he is in costume #3: a hoodie that zips up to make a skull costume. He combined the skull vampire cape for a complete look and was off with the neighborhood posse to score a huge load of candy.

The Ulysses Kids.

There is one house a couple blocks away where the crazy lady puts weird things in her yard. See the manikin head in front of the window? It's always there, usually with a wig and hat on. Her lights are Halloween themed with 4th of July ribbons on them. Four years ago she had a Bush sign that was almost as big as her house. Scary!!! Anyhow, this is what she did for Halloween. Noah sat by her for a picture. It was creepy.

Noah sits with vintage serial killer, Mickie the Mouse.

It was a good night. A group of parents walked with the kids who literally ran from house to house to get the most candy in the allotted trick or treating period of time. A lot of people were out which made it more festive. It is rumored that one of the houses was giving out adult treats of jello shots for the parents. The idea is so amazing that we just might have to do that next year.

Happy Belated Halloween to all!

Halloween Neighborhood Party

Noah wanted a Halloween party. I love throwing parties, so it was easy to say yes.

We kept it small, inviting only the neighborhood kids. I still put a ton of work into it and spent over $100. Damn Target and their Halloween displays! Damn being sick and buying pre-packaged games!

Anyhow, it was fun. We decorated inside and out, ordered pizza, had candy and soda pop on hand, and beer for the adults.

I didn't take many pictures but here are a few:

Poor Dodi looked amazing, but didn't realize the awesomeness of her wig.


The only pictures I got of the kids was after the "wrap your partner as a mummy game." Here are the winners.

Sam was "banana man with a beard" and Lexi was a dark fairy.


Mac was Gene Simmons and Noah was a vampire.


We had a "make a monster" game that Stan and Melissa judged. This one we dubbed "Taco Monster" only to discover later it was supposed to be a hot dog. Go figure.


I made Noah's cape this year. His first, and possibly only, homemade Halloween costume.


Unfortunately, he can't wear it to school because skulls are verboten. Stupid rules. What are they thinking? Skulls are the awesome!!!

Obama Lost Because of . . . ME?

Colin Powell endorses Obama

It is worth the seven minutes to hear him explain why he is voting for Obama.



The most poignant part of his monologue explaining why he is voting for Obama included a reference to this picture. It is a mother at the grave of her 20 year old son who died fighting for his country in Iraq. He is a Muslim.


People are claiming Obama is a Muslim, as if this makes him bad, as if this makes him a terrorist. Obama is not a Muslim, but if he was? There is nothing wrong with that. McCain would have you believe otherwise. That is not my America. In my America, people are free to worship as they see fit. Thankfully, that is also Obama's America.

Of course, it is hard to take the religious right seriously. Especially when they beleive things like this.

Family Breakfast

When Jesse was in town, we went out for family breakfast at Hell's Kitchen. It was not only yummy, but lots of fun.

Noah was with some of his favorite couples and hugged them all.

Jesse, Noah and Sarah

Papa John, Noah and Grandma Reade

Mom, Noah and Daddy

Jesse and Sarah are a fabulously adorable couple. Obviously, they were happy to be in close physical proximity to each other again.

With Reade around, things always get a little bit crazy.

PDA! PDA!!!

The brothers.

While I am not apposed to moving to California to be near our Jesse, I wonder about the feasibility of the proposal. The upcoming prediction from the Farmer's Almanac of a fucking amazing cold winter does make the proposal even more alluring though. . .

Until then, we will have to save our pennies to fly Jesse home to visit more often.

Jesse was in town.

On Saturday, he spent quality time with Noah. Either Noah really missed him, or the visit stopped his DT's.
We saw him briefly Friday night. Noah was sad when we left because he thought that was it, the whole visit. He cheered up when he realized that we had two more days of Jesse.

Saturday Jesse got a haircut at Juut. Then I got to have lunch with Sarah and Jesse before they jetted off to have quality time with Noah. The Keathly family then met said couple at Pizza Luce for dinner before the opening reception of Jesse and Paul's photography show.

Grandma Reade took Noah home from the show so we could attend the bar after party. Next on the agenda was Hell's Kitchen for breakfast. Reade and John showed up with the kid. Jesse, Sarah and the K's rounded out the group. It was great food and reminded us how much we miss family breakfasts with Jesse and Sarah.

That was it for us. Jesse time was already over. It wasn't as hard to say good-bye this time. At least for us. When Noah yelled, "I love you!" out the window, it broke Jesse's heart.

At least Jesse is making enough money to visit a couple times a year. Right? Jesse? Right!?! It kills us to have him so far away. But we are so proud he did it. He moved where he belongs and is building a great life for himself that doesn't involve winter. Heck, we might not be there, but at least his amazing girlfriend will follow - and I'll be out another great friend.

Freaking. Heck.

Sarah Palin IS "Head of Skate"

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

un/dead

Jesse is coming home to MN to the reception for his first gallery show. It is at Umber Studios in Minneapolis. He has collaborated with his longtime friend and fellow photographer, Paul Armstrong for this, shall we say, unique? show. It is called un/dead.

jesse mullan's photographs are semi-candid and purposefully focused images from the zombie pub crawls. he humorously explores the human relationship with death and the macabre; why we as human beings like scary movies and dressing up as monsters. the selected images are cinematic and full of action, a perfect contrast to the still presence of paul's photography...

paul armstrong's photographs are a reaction to his oddly consistent findings of dead birds and animals while out minding his own business. presenting them in saturated hyper-realism, he preserves the little beings against the ravages of time. it is difficult to decide if he is exploiting their uncomfortable beauty or honoring their existence in their final pose...

come see!

opening reception 8pm | saturday, september 27th
(through october 15th)

View paul's photos

View jesse's photos.
2005 zombie pub crawl
2006 zombie pub crawl
2007 zombie pub crawl

We will be there - you should too!

Hair, glorius hair.

A couple weeks ago, we went out to celebrate Nemy's birthday. I ratted up my bangs and we were off!

Team Keathly!

Nemy had an entirely new 'do to show off. Short hair with messy layers and light brown color vs. red. She looked GREAT.

And me, I was rocking the pompadour.

I had not cut or colored my hair all summer. There were too many kids to watch and lots of beautiful sunny weather to enjoy. The last thing I had was 3 hours for vanity.

But, then came school. Glorious school. No more kid sitting. No more nights saved for going to the park with the boys. It was hair time.

I decided to punk it up a bit.

It's dark, it's shorter!

It's the awesome.

I still haven't quite learned how to style it (and these pictures are after a full day of work) but I loves it.

Two girls, two new looks. Awesome.

Jesse's send off to CALIFORNICATION!!!!

Jesse's last night in town. It was a Saturday. I came home from work to find the party started. The plan was to meet up at our place and end up at the burlesque show at the 331. Tentatively, we were also going to a strip club as well, but we just didn't have the stamina, I mean time.

The 331 was crowded. Thankfully, our neighbors were there and invited us to share a table with them.

The neighbors: Ali, Melissa and Bob.

Jesse's booth was packed and rowdy.

Paul, Jesse and a co-worker whose name I don't know.

Finally, it calmed down and we could rejoin his party.

Zach and Dani were still there as well.

Paul and Jesse were happy with our alteration of the reservation sign. Paul also likes to stick out his tongue. A lot.

The next morning we met for breakfast at The Uptown Grill, which has perfect hangover food: good, greasy and plentiful.

Jesse and his mom Reade. They both have the same nose, don't ya think?

John could not believe the size of his breakfast.

Jesse and his Cajun breakfast.

Noah grew a mustache for the occasion.

I covet Zach's ET/Aliens shirt.

Jesse with Reade and John.

The rest of the day was spent napping and then we hit the water park. The fact that Jesse was leaving was becoming all too real.

Our Water Park Adventure with the Jesse.

The night before Jesse left, we took him out for drinks and debauchery. The next morning, he had that "not so fresh feeling." We took him to breakfast and then let him take a nap. Next on the agenda: water slides.

Noah had been begging us to hit the water park after family breakfast for weeks. The weather conspired against us, until the very last full day Jesse was in town. It was ON.

There are three water slides at the park. The orange slide is for inner tubes. It's entertaining. The red one is a nice, meandering ride. It's relaxing. The yellow one is the greased pig of slides. You are the bullet and the slide is the gun. It is the awesome!

The Water Slides at Jim Lupient Water Park.

Noah insisted on someone catching him at the end of the slides. Here is Jesse doing his big brother duty and keeping Noah's head above water.

"Hey Jesse!"

"Catch me!"

Noah showed off his skills he learned in his recent swimming class. He had fun hanging with his big brother.

Noah loves his big brother.

Swimming pools = rain. Both are good places to blame for tears and red eye.

Stan and Noah

The boy has the cutest towel in the history of towels.

It was an awesome ending to our last full day with our Jesse. We miss him so and are looking forward to having him in town the last week of September! If only he could stay. . .

Noah's First day of FIRST GRADE!

I don't have a lot to say about Noah's first day of First Grade.

This is for three reasons:

1. Stan dropped him off at school.
2. Stan picked him up from the after school program, Rec-Plus.
3. Noah was asleep when I got home from work.

It could also be summed up in one point:

1. Tuesday is my Eleven Hour Day at work. Yes, that's right, I capitalized it. You should be glad that I'm not stealing all of Noah's thunder by putting it in bold, because that is a dang long day of massaging. Also, my hands hurt.

I did find out the few kids that are in his class from last year: kindergarten. I also found out that they did a card game over recess since it was raining and they couldn't go outside. Noah's table had only 1 point and the winning table had 3.

Stan also took two great pictures of Noah in front of his school. Actually, it's more like the side of the school, but it is more photogenic.