"Liberal Media" = Liars? What!?!

The Newsweek story was true? What? But they're still apologizing for it? What? WHAT!?!

Why is no one owning up to the shit that the USA and its president are doing? Why is no one questioning the facts?
We are in a war that was based on lies. And there are no reprocussions.

Even now, more evidence is coming to light about his urgency to twist data as an excuse to start the war. And nothing.
No outcries from the public. No media frenzy. I just don't understand.

Why isn't everyone talking about THIS?

Bored. Bored. Bored.

So bored.

No energy.

No sun.

Too cold.

Too much rain.

Extended forecast calls for: more rain.

I hate spring.

We Are the Dead


I always "buy" a poppy whenever I see a VFW selling one. It reminds me of my grandparents. They would display the cheap red poppies proudly. My grandpa would wear one in his lapel and my grandma would sport one like a treasured brooch. I never knew the history of the poppy, so I looked it up. Here it is:

The poem "In Flander's Field" describes a battlefield of crosses dotted with red poppies. The poem deeply touched the nation and the world, and, from that point on, poppies became known throughout the world as a memorial flower, a reminder of the lives lost in wartime.

"In Flander's Fields" by John McCrae

In Flander's Fields the poppies blow,
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky,
The larks, still bravely singing, fly,
Scare heard amid the guns below.

We are the dead.
Short days ago,
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved and now we lie,
In Flanders Fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe
To you, from failing hands, we throw,
The torch, be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us, who die,
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow,
In Flanders Fields.

This Memorial Day Weekend let's carry on the tradition. Please make a donation and wear your poppy.


President Admits to Propaganda

The president finally admits everything he says is propoganda. Or at least just his social security schpiel.

"See, in my line of work you got to keep repeating things over and over and over again for the truth to sink in, to kind of catapult the propaganda. (Applause.)"

I especially love that the audience applauded afterwards. Yea!! We're being brainwashed! Woo-hoo!!

Idiots.

Thank You, Minneapolis!!

Noah rocks out.









Classroom Pets

In 3rd grade we had two mice as classroom pets. They were there to illustrate how eating habits effect your body. One we fed vegetables and healthy mouse pellets. The other one we fed a lot more stuff, and gave it junk food. I don't remember exactly what we fed it, but I do remember them ending up looking something like this:



In 4th grade we each got 2 green anole lizards and a cage to take them home in. We kept journals and charted their growth and behavior. I named mine Big Jim and Little Jim. Yes, I know, I'm very creative. Anyhow, one day I found little Jim dead and brown, covered in ants. I guess that means I didn't take very good care of them. Thank goodness our "real" pets fared better. Anyhow, here's what they looked like, when they were alive that is:



I also remember my 2nd grade teacher brining in a friend's boa constricter for us to see and learn about snakes. I thought it was the coolest thing ever and remember how much that freaking thing weighed when he put it on my shoulders. I still like snakes. Lizards are fine. Rodents okay, unless it's a mouse in my house. Spiders and centipedes though will be killed on site. Maybe I would feel differently if only I would have been forced to interact with one? I doubt it, since my neighbors had a terrarium filled with tarantulas. I was fascinated with it, but also scared to death that they would get out and somehow make it next door to my room at night. You know, like that Brady bunch episode in Hawaii where the tarantula is crawling up Peter's chest as he's sleeping? Freaky.

Read My Lips: "Regressive Taxes"

We're not wealthy. Far from it. We're a paycheck to paycheck living, credit card debt having, typical American middle class family. At the end of every month that checkbook balance gets alarmingly low and we don't have money for extras.

So when we got an $85 ticket last week for not having the tab on our front license plate, I was wondering how we were going to pay it. And enraged. $85 for not having a sticker on the front of my car, but the back? $85 even after I can prove that we have the tabs and paid for the tabs? That is nothing short of ridiculous. Whatever happened to warnings? Give us a chance to replace the sticker. If we don't, then it's time for a ticket.

I was looking for applicable state law and found an article on how police are "cracking down" on license plate violations to make up for the loss of tax revenue. It's called "Reverend, Step Away From The License Plate Cover" by Nick Coleman. Here's an excerpt:

". . . This is predatory revenue-ing.

Let's not call this kind of thing a surcharge. Let's call it by its real name: a rip-off.

Regressive taxes disguised as user fees, assessments and surcharges fall most heavily on families whose budgets are stretched to the breaking point (THAT'S ME!) while politicians crow about cutting taxes. The state now receives $400 million in such rip-offs, and they are fraudulent (PREACH IT BROTHER!).

So clip and save this Coleman Caution and read it the next time a politician brags that he/she hasn't raised taxes:

"'No New Taxes' is a slogan that means not restoring progressive rates of income taxation on wealthy citizens. For everyone else in Minnesota, surcharges, user fees, assessments and sharp increases in real estate taxation rates will apply."

We are going to meet with a hearing officer and see if we can get it reduced to a warning. But I am not optimistic.

You're Marrying WHO!?!?!

Mary Kay Letourneau and Vili Fualaau were married on May 20th, just two days ago. I guess that means they're on their honeymoon right now, I suspect, compliments of Entertainment Tonight who had exclusive access to the couple and ceremony, which ET probably paid for as well. After all, how could a spottily employed high school dropout and ex-con afford a lavish wedding for 200?



It's so hard to believe that this is a relationship built on eternal love. It appears to have been built on sex and inappropriate moral behavior. A 34 year old woman should not have sex with a 13 year old. EVER. I could not imagine how Vili's mother must feel. She's been raising her grandchildren while their mother is in jail for 7 years after having to endure a media circus and trial about her son's sex life. I don't imagine I would be smiling at their wedding, that's for sure.



Having sex with a child is wrong. Always wrong. But I guess society is calling it water under the bridge and sending them gifts for their wedding. Disagree with me? You can send them one yourself from their registry at Macy's.

Little Man with the Bro

As you can tell, he has a horrible time with the sitter. Absolutely hates it when we leave.

Red Panda Impersinates Humans

Holy Chewbacca, Batman! But this sure looks weird.



Apparently, he can't walk, but can stand for up to 10 seconds at a time. While this doesn't sound too impressive to me, heck I can stand for hours, I guess in the land of the red pandas, that is a world record. Impressive enough to have people flocking to the zoo in china to see Futa-kun.

All I know is it creeps me out.


The C Chip

It's really laughable to hear about the V-chip. This is because I am stuck in kid TV land, and I'm not talking "Full House" reruns on Nick at Nite. I'm talking about the TV being Noah's domain. It is always on a kid show or playing a DVD for Noah. Rarely do I get to watch any adult TV, let alone something I wouldn't want Noah to watch.

I used to watch Angel every week. God, how I miss Angel. Then it was Sex and the City, but I've seen all I want of that show. So now I'm a viewer without a regular show and without a TV to call my own. Now I spend most of my time watching shows like this:



Yup, it's the Doodlebops. Jeppa refers to them as "the cross dressing clowns". Being of the clown fearing persuasion, I reminded him that they are DOODLEBOPS, not clowns. And damn me and my wonderous memory, I already know all the songs. Noah usually hates my singing though, so at least I have something to get him back with.


AAAAARGH

This morning Noah was impossible to control at his gymnastics class. Not only would he not warm up with the kids & teacher, he was running back and forth, crawling on chairs and distracting the rest of the kids. I finally took him out and told him that he needed to follow the rules if he wanted to play on the equipment. I don't think he even bothered to listen. I don't think he cared.

I was so frustrated. Should I have punished him by leaving? Stayed out of the whole thing and let the teacher handle it? Another part of me worries at his social interaction patterns and skills. Is it good that he's not following the crowd? That I don't know about, but I don't like him being a negative influence. Right now I'm too frustrated to have any perspective.

When we were leaving he kept yelling that he didn't want to get in his carseat. I told him I didn't care. I got into the driver's seat and noticed something hanging from the rearview mirror of the minivan next to me. It was earplugs on a cord. I felt a little better knowing that another parent's kid drove them so nuts they actually kept earplugs in the car. I also thought it was a good idea. I think I'm going to go get me a pair.

My Son is an Artist Just Like His Daddy

Check out his futuristic car:





Blurkers

I don't flatter myself. I don't think that I have any blurkers, or any regular ones at that. If I do, I'd love to hear from you and check out your blog as well. After all, if you like mine, I'd probably vibe with yours.

I myself am a confirmed blurker. Although I would welcome comments from strangers on my posts (hopefully positive) I don't feel that I would make someone's day by leaving one of my own. I know, I have self-esteem issues, but hey, who in this world doesn't? I have left comments a couple of times, but don't feel called to make "shout-outs" to every page I visit. And I don't leave anonymous comments. I let them know who I am.

I think the "blurking" term is ridiculous. A blog is just a web page posted on the internet for people to read. And when people do read them, it's considered lurking? The author is upset/surprised? That's just effed up. If you don't want someone reading your page, make it private. Otherwise you need to assume that everyone you know and don't know are reading it. Don't want the world to know something? Easy, don't post it.

This blog is for me. If someone likes to read it and it becomes a discussion board, I'd be happy with that. Meet cyberfriends? Gain cyberenemies? Hope not on the second one, but still, welcome one and all. Read, comment if you want to. Let me know if you think I rock out or am a total piece of crap. It'll break up the tedium of my day, which really, for me, is what this blog is all about.

Badger Badger Badger

Jeppa introduced Noah to THIS.

He was singing it in the car last night.

My kid is the best.

Using the Trendy Bar Phone in my Jammies

A few years ago I would have rather died than use a phone outside Liquor Lyle's in Uptown in my jammies and a sweatshirt with no makeup and my glasses on. Surrounded by smokers (damn you, smoking ban!) and those awaiting the privilege to enter said establishment. But now, older and wiser, I did not care. I smiled at passerby and dialed Jeppa's cell phone number again and again, hanging up just before I was thrown into voicemail. Fiffy cents for a local call? Damn!!!

Our roomie was drunk and wandering the streets of Uptown. Stan had already left to meet him at 26th and Nicollet when Jeppa called back to say that he was NOT at 26th and Nicollet. As a matter of fact, he was at least 12 streets away. So I grabbed Noah and drove to meet Stan.

Jeppa was instructed to stay put, but wouldn't listen to me. He told me he saw the sign for Lyndale straight ahead of him and that he had just passed Aldrich. So I knew he was heading in the right direction. Little did I know that he just assumed the street in front of him was Lyndale. It was really Hennepin. He was heading away from where he was supposed to meet us.

And he was on the phone. So I left a message and went back to the car to continue looking for him. I don't know how many times Stan and I, along with Noah, drove down Nicollet and Franklin looking for Jeppa. Finally, I decided to go home with Noah and let Stan continue the search alone. I dropped him off at his car and we were off down Nicollet. As soon as we were at Franklin, we saw Jeppa. He had walked 1.7 miles out of his way. While he was rip roaring drunk. I would have loved to see him run in that state. It must have been at least as funny as his white-boy-Phil-Hartman-dance.

So we were successful sober cab drivers in that we finally found our man. And we stayed up for awhile with him after we got Noah to bed. Commiserating about his evening and the fact that it's been at least 4 years since the 3 of us have been out drinking together. And the fact that we need to tag him with GPS, along with Noah. Maybe we can find a 2 for 1 deal?

Evil Effed-up Monkey Virus

I am better than yesterday, but am at the point where a lot of stuff is draining down into my mouth and it's so not pretty. "Draining" isn't even the right word since the consistency of the muck is disgustingly thick. It's more like a slow slide. Like a slug, moving at the speed of dusk.

Jeff Vogel at Irony Central writes this about kids as carriers:

"Children are renowned for their skill as disease vectors, picking up germs from all their little friends and inflicting them on their undeserving parents. Cordelia has a knack for it. My wife Mariann and I are still warm and loving in all the ways legally required, but it is hard to keep from flinching when she runs up to hug us. Even her most adorable smile is not enough to help us keep from speculating on what evil, fucked-up, monkey virus she is infecting us with at that moment."

Like I wrote before, I know how to handle sinus congestion. I will be 100% by Sunday if I stay on track. But the 60% I'm at right now sucks. I am too tired, my head hurts and I am in need of some TLC.

Sick Again

Another two weeks, another sinus cold bordering on infection. Why me? Is it the little monster's friends making me sick all the time? Or is it the cold, wet summer that is again convincing me that we live in Seattle without the scenery?

No matter what the answers are, the fact remains that I am effing sick. Poor Noah was stuck watching TV for hours today and limited to interaction with me on the couch. I was surprised how good he was all day despite the lack of physical activity.

From my past years of chronic sinus infections, I have the routine down. Please copy for your future use. I am experienced. It takes a couple days, but this WILL MAKE YOU WELL. Eventually.

LISA'S SINUS REMEDIES:

1. Irrigate your sinuses with warm water and salt. Yes, I mean up your nose. Remember to tilt your head back so it goes up into your sinus cavities. 1/2 tsp salt to 1 cup of water is good. Do not use iodized salt. The iodine will irritate your mucous membranes. Over the counter saline spray also works, but hurts like a SOB. Using a bulb syringe is perfect for this, although you could also buy a neti pot. Do 3 times a day.
   
2. Steam with essential oils of eucalyptis, tea tree and lavendar. 3-4 drops of each in a soup bowl of hot water. Don't use the eucalyptis at night, and be careful using it with Sudafed, as they are both stimulants. Do up to 6 or 7 times a day, at the very least twice.
   
3. Massage your shoulders, neck and eyebrows. Tension causes constriction which will keep your sinuses from draining. Work the sides and front of your neck. Even better - get a professional massage.
   
4. Use moist heat on your head, neck and shoulders. Warming up a damp handtowel in the microwave works very well.
5. Over the counter Sudafed and prescription Flonase both kick ass.
6. Traditional Medicinal Tea - Breathe Easy, Echinachea and Throat Coat.
   

I hope this helps anyone who is looking for sinus relief tips. Time for me to go and take some of my own sage advice.

Are You Drawn to the Light or the Dark Side of the Force?

Take this quiz to find out:

Force O Meter

XOXO

Leia

Happy Mother's Day

We had the obligatory family gathering here today with Stan's family. This spared us the long drive to his parent's house, which we hate almost as much as Noah hates being strapped down for 2 hours in his car seat.

We had been doing a ton of cleaning the past few days so there was no running around hiding things in closets, cupboards and ovens. Instead we went to Momma Reade's for coffee and pastries and hung out in her garden. Then we put Noah down for a nap and did some final polishing of the house. We ordered pizza and delegated snacks amoung the relatives. So it was an easy, mellow day.

I got some gifts and about $100 in Target gift cards. Kick ass. I wish I could have taken off to shop then and there. But I guess I can wait until tomorrow.

We'll see the gang again next weekend for my nephew's birthday. Thus begins the summer of family gatherings which loom on our calendar like a parasite of our free time.

Oh well, at least we don't have a lot of gatherings with my family. And when we do we can drink alcohol. This is the great equilizer for spending time with people you wouldn't if it wasn't for that pesky fact that you share some DNA.

The Grandparents are convinced that Noah is a genius and keep saying how handsome he is. I like these people. They obviously recognize a talented child when they see him. And they always bring him gifts. Spoil my child and it will take a lot of republican, "I love FOX News" crap to make me not like you. Loving my kid is the second great equilizer. Cake is the third. When you keep your mouth full, it's easier to keep from saying things you want to say, but probably should not.

Ex-Painter

I used to paint for a living, when I was in college. Not one of those "college painters" but an actual member of the paint crew on my college campus. So I spent my summers painting the dorm rooms and school years painting the academic and office buildings. It was a great job. We took long breaks and every Friday went for a long lunch at Godfather's Pizza and made malts in a 5 gallon bucket with a special attachment that we used on the big "drill" we used to mix mud and cement. We painted above and beyond the call of duty one summer so our boss took us to Valleyfair for a day. Just like the last day of school or some other fun field trip memory. That job kicked ass.

So you would think that I would know my way around a paintbrush. Which I do, mostly. What I don't know are the answers to questions people have surrounding painting. Like how to patch any kind of hole, spread mud over drywall and the proper way to use a spray gun. A few of these questions came up while prepping and painting my bedroom today. We had a moisture problem in the distant past that wreaked havoc on our one wall and part of the ceiling. Not too bad, but it did require some extra attention. And that is the last thing you want to do when painting is your goal. Prepwork is the horrid part of the task that no one wants to do. All the friends say, "Painting? Oh, I'll help!" knowing that you have to have all the prepwork done before hand so that it's ready to paint when they come over. No one says, "Painting? You want me to come over the day before and help you prep the area?" If anyone ever says that to me they will immediately become my very best friend ever.

I finally got the prepwork done and the first coat of paint on the walls. Stan took Noah to the park while I worked so I was able to listen to adult music at an adult level (i.e. LOUD!). I finally got a chance to listen to the new Weezer album that I got my grubby little hands on a couple weeks ago. Jeppa has a friend in Norway who gets music before it's released here. A very kick ass connection. So I listened to that. Twice. And some recent Beck with a Beastie Boys chaser. It was the best part of my day.

So the room is looking good. The valances are gone. I don't know how people can pair 25 inches of material with a set of cheap shades and think, "Yeah, that looks good!" when it's obviously the trashiest thing ever. They will soon be replaced by curtains from IKEA. I need to do some hemming, but that's no big deal. Especially after the mega curtain project I completed in the basement to close off my massage space.

And it only took 3 years to get around to it. We have friends who have gorgeous homes with matching furniture and tastefully decorated rooms. But we console ourselves with the fact that they are also in serious debt because of it. It's hard to be patient sometimes, but in the end it's "Totally worth it" (must say in Strongbad voice).

Her Uterus Is Hystery

Nemy lost her uterus this morning. The days of heavy bleeding and stabbing cramp pains are over. Thankfully, they were able to do it laproscopically, so she didn't end up with the big ol' abdominal incision. And she got to keep her ovaries so she won't be pushed into early menopause. She also lost three fibroid tumors the size of oranges (1) and lemons (2). Along with the ability to have children.

I saw her tonight. She looked good. She looked tired. We took a 25 foot walk during which she had to sit down and take a break. She mentioned her desire to adopt one day and we talked about her upcoming wedding. She was positive. At the end of visiting hours (8:30 PM), she looked ready to crash.

I loaned her "A HeartBreaking Work of Staggering Genius" (no, she hadn't read it yet - imagine!) and brought her some bright purple tulips in a square blue glass vase. Kissed her on the top of the head and headed home.

XOXO Sisee. Get well soon.

Happy May Day - It's Snowing!!

I remember the spring of 1983. The spring my grandma died. The week before had been wonderful spring weather. On Easter Sunday I ran wild in my grandparent's 2 acre yard with my sisters and my cousins in the beautiful, warm weather. Flash forward a couple weeks later and I am standing at the upstairs window of my grandparent's house watching a swirling flurry of snow turn the pasture, including cows, white. I thought the weather was right, knew what was happening.

Today I thought of that as I watched it snow on what had previously been a sunny May Day. The snow was thick, coming down hard and white, like miniature hail stones. Then it stopped, and the sun came out again. For about 20 minutes. Then it snowed again. The weather was all mixed up. Couldn't decide. Had a nervous breakdown.

Someone must have died.